A few weeks ago, just before the election, I went to a grocery store on my way home from work (for those who are new, I’m not out at work and so I was cosplaying as a boy). So I got my stuff and went to check out. The cashier was a young person who had THE strongest enby (non binary) vibes I have seen in person in a really long time. The gender fuckery was super strong in this one. Everything about this person completely obliterated whether they were intending to present as a young man or woman right down to their name.

It’s something unusual so I won’t use it but let’s say it’s something like Fleece. So I say, “So you go by Fleece, huh.”

Cue the championship level eye roll and you could almost hear “okay… here we go again.” rolling around in their head. But then Fleece dropped their shoulders in a defeated sort of way and said with a long sigh, "yeah. But I'm thinking of dropping it. I get a lot of people saying not-so-nice things to me about it."

I reply with, "Well I think it's pretty cool." And with my eyes kind of wide and excited I ask, "Are you a theybie? Do you go by they/them pronouns?"

And they said with a slowly arriving smile, "I use she and him depending on how I feel and how most people see me based on how I look."

Me: "No kidding. Huh. Okay. I get it. I get it. Cool. Cool. Look, about your name... people are shitty sometimes, especially those who see others who aren't conforming. I think it's pretty cool and if *you* like it and you feel confident in your name... you should keep it." We talked a little more and I left.

A week goes by, wife asks me to go back to the store and I see her again. This time she was rather cheery (using “she” because Fleece looked very feminine that evening)... really good mood actually and her face kinda lit up a little when she saw me again. She remembered me and we talked a little. That was nice.

I told my therapist about these interactions as just a way to end our session on a high note, not for recognition. But because our session had been a lot of bad news.
He said, "you know Wren, what you did was extremely powerful for that one person. I don't know if you realize how extremely important it most certainly was to that teenager to be seen, especially by someone who was appearing and presenting as a cis man."

I ended the call crying feeling like maybe... just maybe I *had* actually earned a few karma points to offset some of the shitty things I've done in my life.

"In a world where you can be anything...
be kind."

#TransJoy

#ExistenceIsResistance
#BeSomebodyGood
#BeKind