1. Being a main-carer parent is a lot of work.

2. A main-carer parent needs food and shelter.

3. They also need to provide food, shelter, clothing, etc. to their children.

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#Children #Mothers #Parents #UnpaidCarers

4. Food and shelter (and other bits and bobs), in our society, cost money.

5. Parenting being unpaid, but a lot of work, often makes the main-carer parent a dependent of one kind or another. Being dependent can be quite a powerless, even humiliating, position in society.

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#Society #Work #Labor #Money

6. Main-carer parents, arguably, should neither be powerless nor feel humiliated – as it's likely to be counterproductive to their wellbeing and performance.

7. Being unpaid leaves main-carer parents open to exploitation and manipulation, due to depending on the goodwill of others or society.

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#Oppression #Exploitation

8. Main-carer parents are likely to possess the direct knowledge and experience needed to make good judgement calls about the lives & wellbeing of their children. But being relatively powerless and/or penniless makes them less equipped to make those calls, or take meaningful action to improve the lives of their kids.

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#MentalHealth #Childhood #Education

9. Being a main-carer parent is time-consuming (between care work, emotional support, logistics, domestic tasks, food provision & preparation, getting up at night, etc., a main-carer parent can easily be working a 100-hour week). So they lack the time to have a paid job, which results in many families living in poverty.

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#Poverty #Parenting #SingleParent #SingleMom

10. If children see their main-carer parent exhausted, depleted, poverty-stricken, and worried, they may reasonably believe themselves to be a burden. Guilt, and thinking you must not add to your parent's load e.g. by telling them if you're in trouble, isn't conducive to a carefree and emotionally healthy childhood.

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#Guilt #SelfHate #Children #MentalHealth #Childhood

I said I'd cover the ‘buts’ too…

“But who’s going to pay for it?”, “But why should you get paid for something it’s your choice to do?”, “But there are so many intrinsic rewards to being a parent! Why are you making it all about money?”

I've looked at all these, and more, in my article on this topic (link in the post below 👇)

8/9

'Should Parents Be Paid?'

Thanks to all those who contributed to this article with their thoughts and ideas.

https://www.neurofabulous.org.uk/should-parents-be-paid.html

End of 🧵

9/9

#Parenting #Education #Family #Neurodivergent #UnpaidCarers #ActuallyAutistic (me)

Is child-benefit still paid universally to parents? I forget whether it was something the Tories cut...

is still there but is a bit weird as if you have two parents with two jobs than earn more that just one parent working (but less individually) you don't get them.

my husband has a good job but I have been taking care of my kids at home for years and I don't get anything. If my husband was a controlling person instead of a good one I would have serious difficulties with my economy (both kids are neurodivergent, me too).