Welcome to the Slumberdome! Three people enter, nobody sleeps.

#parenting

Just realized daylight savings "fall back" is coming up and I have a toddler who likes to wake up at 4am... 😭 Witness me

#parenting

We got an annual zoo pass, with unlimited access. Hubby is currently teaching the toddler to yell MULTIPASS when she presents it at the gate.

#parenting

One thing about #parenting no one prepared me for is the sheer amount of unsolicited advice I get on the street from random strangers. 😬

Someone recommended #Bluey to me as a kids' show that is fun for parents too and they were so right

The sleepover episode alone 🤣

#parenting #toddlers

Kiddo just gate crashed a NATO conference because the building had escalators.

Ministry of Defense can't stand between a toddler and escalators. 🤣

(Edit: yes, we managed to de-escalate the situation...)

#parenting #toddlers #lol

The kid has a browsing book with animals in different kinds of habitats. While browsing, I started singing little folk songs for bunnies and squirrels and the like.

So now she thinks Mama has a song for every creature under the sun. She doesn't even care what the song is, but we gotta sing for each and every one of them.

This, your honor, is how ended up singing HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR. GIANT ANTEATER at bedtime, thank you.
😆

(And Boogie Wonderland for the penguins.....)

#parenting #animals

Husband: "Didn't you throw screaming fits too when you were a kid?"

Me: "No. I drew little devil badges, and presented the Order of the Devil to my parents in a solemn ceremony to make sure they knew they were Bad."

Husband, who is a kindergarten teacher: 😐😐😐

#parenting #childhood #IBlameThePassiveAggressiveGrandma

"Honey shall I make you a plate of food to see if the kid is hungry?"

#parenting

My evening

#parenting #books #image #memes #Busytown

The wet playground has ankle-deep water, except for one random spot where it's three feet deep. Ask me how we found out.

#parenting #DesignFail #MamaToTheRescue

Husband in the kid's room: "Let's put this seal in the toy box."

Me, from the other room: "It's a seal'd container!"

Husband: "No."

Me: "...Blubberware."

#puns #parenting #notsorry

"Yes honey, we will go home and you can eat the kitty cat."

The elderly lady giving me a horrified look at the park probably doesn't know chicken nuggets come in cat-shaped pieces now...

😆 🐈

#parenting #oops

Kid had a red (unicorn) t-shirt on today, and was wearing Spiderman sneakers. She has long hair, and yet all the moms at the playground immediately defaulted to calling her a little boy.

The whole thing fascinates me. My mom tells me you can only find red and blue at rhe boys' section at the store. I am amazed at how gender coded kids' clothing is... 😆

#gender #parenting #WTF

Me: "The kid is yelling at me about physics again."

Husband: "To be fair I often wish I could yell at someone about physics..."

#parenting

Her father often jokes that Birdie shall become either a great pirate or politician. He does not seem to understand that it is tolerance that makes these two professions possible, and ultimately, inevitable.

https://earlywithdrawal.net/tolton/2022/06/22/the-salt-island-diaries

#midjourney #dad #parenting #SaltIslandDiaries