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The Five Stages of Bedtime:

1. Alright, kid is in bed. She'll be out soon. Then I'll make myself a sandwich, watch the season finale of The Pitt, maybe do some journaling, take a shower, do Duolingo, and read some before bed.

2. Alright maybe just shower, the sandwich and the show then.

3. Actually I'm not that hungry.

4. Oh please gods give me strength to get up and shower.

5. Goddammit

#parenting
There's also the variant where you just fall asleep on the sofa and wake up in the middle of the night.